Unnecessary Commotion

Mark 5:38-39

      Have you noticed how some people get spun up over the seemingly smallest things! They go from zero to sixty emotionally in an instant. You try to reason with them, but it is almost as if they can’t hear what you are saying, their emotions get in the way. To an outsider their reaction makes little sense, since it is out of proportion to the situation.

      Often the emotional reaction seems to get others caught up in the emotions. Soon it isn’t one person, but a whole group who are reacting.

      Not all emotional scenes are out of proportion to the situation. Sometimes emotions being expressed is a good thing, a healthy thing, a positive thing. When someone dies it is a good thing to express emotions and not keep all the pain bottled up inside. Some cultures do a better job at allowing these emotional expressions than others. Many Western cultures do a pretty poor job at allowing public expressions of emotion. The British call this having a “stiff upper lip.”

      Our text records a crowd of people acting appropriately. A young girl has died. This is something worth crying about! There is something deep inside us that yells, “Children aren’t supposed to die before their parents!” So the crowd has gathered to express their support for this family. They are joining them in their grief. The family doesn’t need to feel alone while they walk through their pain.

      Jesus comes upon this scene and knows that He is going to raise this girl back to life. He knows the emotions are not helpful to the eventual outcome. He knows the tears and crying are not necessary since he has arrived.

      Jesus tells the crowd and the family, including Jairus who came to get Him, that the girl is not dead but asleep. Now either Jesus is telling this crowd that none of them know what dead is, or Jesus is using the term asleep to indicate that her state is temporary. I am sure they tried to wake her up when she first died. I am sure they checked to see if she was breathing. All the noise and commotion certainly would have woken her up, if she was capable of waking up.

      The reality is that if Jesus had not arrived she would be buried that day, as was the custom. Even if she was in a deep coma, she would be in the ground within hours. If Jesus hadn’t come, no matter her condition, the chapter had been written. She was dead.

      Why does this matter? When Jesus enters a scene everything can change. Even the worst marriage, the affairs, the addictions, the hurts, can be changed. The worst financial situations, Jesus can change it. It might mean bankruptcy and years of voluntary repayment, but Jesus’ grace will see you through it. The most rebellious child can be changed. It might take some tough choices, like intervention, treatment, jail. But Jesus can change a heart when He is invited in to stay.

Waiting Room

Proverbs 15:30

      Have you ever had to wait in a hospital waiting room while someone you love is going through an operation? Those moments can be the longest moments on earth. You see the doctor walking down the hallway toward you, and you examine their face for the smallest hint that things went well. Are they walking the walk of defeat, hanging their head looking like they lost, or are they bouncing triumphantly, head held high, smile on their face?

      The words of this proverb have never rung so true in my life as they do today. When I recently saw the doctor’s face, relief gripped my heart. My heart was so filled, I leaked out of my eyes. A weight had been lifted. I felt it through my whole body.

      Have you ever had any of these ‘sitting on the edge of your seat’ moments? Life and death hanging in the balance, waiting for the news? Our military families live with this kind of moments for months at a time. They never know if the next knock on the door means someone is here to tell them their soldier has died, or that it is Girl Scout cookie time. No wonder being in the military takes a special kind of person and family. They have the hardest of all lifestyles. They never know what the moments will bring.

      I recently served as the judge in a legal matter. As soon as the verdict was read, the defendant stood silent, searching my face for what the verdict meant. When I smiled at him, you could see the relief flood his whole body. He had his life back!

      Of course our spouse and children know our looks, as we know their looks. We must be aware of our looks, and make sure that they reflect the presence of the LORD. If we are depressed, then get some help. Find a professional to talk to. If we need to repent, then repent. We are responsible for our witness, at home and in the world. We need to be able to bring the Good News from a vessel that has experienced His joy. Don’t fake it. Live it.

Laughing at a Funeral

Proverbs 14:13

The expression of one emotion does not mean that other, even seemingly contradictory emotion, does not exist. Our emotions are very transient. They can change in a moment. But a change from one emotion to another does not mean that there is a permanent shift away from the first to the second. Emotion can be like the waves on a beach, ever shifting and retreating.

I see this shifting most frequently at a funeral and the moments around the funeral. Those who knew the person who died will laugh as they remember some funny incident from their life. To an outsider laughter and grief don’t seem to go hand in hand. And yet, they do seem to go together.

When I was very young I remember my maternal grandmother making lollipops from scratch. She had the metal molds that were carefully washed, oiled and put together with rubber bands. Then all the ingredients were carefully measure and combined. Anticipation began to fill the air.

The pan of ingredients would be placed on the stove and carefully monitored for temperature and time. The thermometer was always right at hand. The temperature had to be just right or the pops would not be hard.

I remember staring into the post and watching the bubbles rise to the surface, create a bubble and then slowly pop. I couldn’t predict the size of the bubble or the exact moment of it breaking. And this part of the process meant that the ingredients were ready for pouring into the molds.

The unpredictable nature of the bubbles reminds me of emotions. They seem to rise to the surface driven by an unseen force. There is no controlling them. The size is unpredictable and the moment of expression is sudden. We can see that they are coming, but we don’t always know when they will be expressed and exactly what will be expressed.

So next time you see emotion rising be ready for joy and sorrow. They are often present at the same time in our lives.

Pain, Lonely Pain

Proverbs 14:10

We are all unique individuals who live with others who share many things in common. As we experience the sorrows and joys that inevitably come to us as human beings living in a fallen world, there are many common factors to those experiences. These common factors to human experience tie us together.

The longer we live, the more likely it is that someone close to us will die. There are few pains that run as deeply as the death of a loved one. And once you have been through a death, you are better able to relate to others who go through this. You know some of their pain, just as they know some of yours.

But there is also a part of your pain that they can’t relate to. Some of that pain is unique to you. I have found this especially true of the surviving spouses of soldiers killed in combat. Each has a story of their own relationship, the ups and downs, infidelity and losses, missed opportunities and justified angers. This relationship history makes the loss even more individual.

They remember the previous goodbyes and the pain of previous separations, the long waits for word of safety. They remember the angry last words, or silence as the plane was loaded with their man. They are angry over choices their spouse made during the relationship which didn’t have time to heal before they were killed. And for some, it never will heal. They will never hear the words their hearts need to hear.

And then the circumstances of the death make their pain unique. Because of the injuries inflicted, some spouses never get to kiss their loved one goodbye. They sometimes don’t even have the opportunity to touch their body to confirm it was their loved one. They must rely on DNA, dental records, and the eyewitness testimony to confirm the identity of the remains. And for some, doubts complicate the grieving process.

Each of us has our own pains, similar to other’s pain, but unique to us. And the same holds true for our joys. The joy of holding my grandkids is mine alone. They are special to me because I have so far escaped death. I am still alive, by the grace of God, and I rejoice in each moment with them. I may not have many more. But then again, I may have many more years. But as my spouse and kids will testify, my wet eyes betray the joys I feel.

Although we are unique in many ways, I want to encourage you to reach out to those around you and join in their sorrows and joys. You will become more fully a servant of Christ in the process. He was a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief. We should be like Him.

The Twenty’s

Psalm 20, 50, 80, 110, 140

Have you ever had someone pray for you and bless you in a way that made you feel important, special and sure to succeed? This is exactly how Psalm 20 begins. Never underestimate the power of words, especially those spoken to those closest to us. With a word we can wound. Even a look can speak volumes. Unfortunately, many of us are unaware of the impact of our words, and more often than not, they are negative words. It takes about twenty positive statements to undo each negative one. Yikes! We had better get busy with those positive ones. We trust in the name of the LORD (v7). At least we say we do. But do we really, on a moment by moment basis trust in Him? Or are we trying to figure it out on our own?

The LORD calls heaven and earth as a witness against Israel in Psalm 50. I don’t envy their position. And it sounds as though they are living out of obligation rather than thanksgiving (vv14-15). God has designed us for fellowship with Him. Our attitude needs to be one of thanksgiving, rather than dread and obligation. I would much rather be about people who are thankful than people who live by “musts” and “have to’s”. I want people who are excited to be involved rather than those who were “volun-told”. Volunteers want to be there and they bring an energy to any project. Are you a volun-told Jesus-follower?

Psalm 80 is a responsive psalm with the congregation repeating the words of petition for restoration (vv3, 7, 19) after each section. The first section (vv1-2) calls on God to hear the prayer, the God sitting in heaven to answer us here on earth. The second section (vv4-6) recounts the present state of those in need of restoration: tears. The third section, starting in verse eight, uses the metaphor of a vine for God’s people. God planted the vine (v8), prepare a perfect place for it to grow (vv9-11), and then brought judgment. Their request is that a godly leader would rise at the LORD’s bidding and be used to bring restoration (vv17-18). How do you see restoration?

There are times in life when I just don’t completely know if someone is speaking to me, or to someone else. Do you ever get that? Maybe it is because I have a bit of hearing loss, or because crowds drive me nuts, but sometimes…. As I read Psalm 110, I am not sure who is being addressed. Who is this lord (v1) and the you (v4)? Is it a servant of the king, giving a message from the LORD about the king’s future conquests against his enemies? But then how is this king a priest, when kings are usually not priests? And how is he in Melchizedek’s order, a priest without family connections, and no known end of life? If you have figured out this psalm, please let me hear what your insights are into this.

Be careful what people devise! Psalm 140 talks about evil people who devise plans (v2) and devise ways to trip up the author (v4). His desire for these evil people who want his destruction is refreshingly honest (vv9-11). These verses express what I have felt a few times toward some folks who were not very nice to me or to those about whom I cared. Burning coals and fire might be appropriate punishments for them. He simply wants justice and the needy protected (v12). Because when the least are protected, the LORD is praised.