Timely Word

Proverbs 15:23

      One of the small joys in life is being able to help someone who asks you a question, and you actually have a really good answer. And the answer you give is accepted and it is helpful. I’m not talking about a smart alec reply, one that makes you look smart and they look stupid. I am talking about actually being helpful, supportive, caring, present, and genuine.

      Do you find joy when you help someone? I hope you do. I like it when others succeed. I don’t have to be the object of people’s attention. I can sit in the background and watch others succeed. The spotlight can shine on other people. Can you allow other people to get the credit?

      When we are asked for advice we need to be sure our advice fits the situation. We need to gather enough information to be sure what we are going to say really fits with the problem being presented. Maybe they have already tried what we are going to suggest! Find out what they have already tried. Find out more background. Clarify their goals. Listen to the Holy Spirit.

      There isn’t much that is worse than a “I knew it was going to fail, and I didn’t tell you about it.” The timing of our reply must be right. If we are too soon, they might not be ready for advice. If we are too late, then it might be too late to really make an impact on the outcome. Timing is important in advice giving.

      I want to encourage you to give answers that will stand the test of time. When you don’t know, tell them you don’t know. When you do know, be willing to share your expertise with them. Do it in a way that can be heard and accepted.

Facebook Narcissist

Proverbs 13:10

There are few things that bother me in life more than someone who thinks they know it all. It is amazing when their opinion is the only one that matters, or that they are right about everything. Now when you get two people like that in the same conversation, look out! Chances are a fight is on the way.

Part of being a person of integrity is recognizing that we don’t know everything, that other people’s opinions matter. For instance, we can’t know how another person feels until they tell us. And they are entitled to feel that way. There is not right or wrong way to feel. The words “You shouldn’t feel that way” just aren’t true, no matter how much the know-it-all insists.

This is one of the reasons we all need to learn to listen well. We all need to learn to see life from the other person’s perspective, from their shoes. Unfortunately, our culture is now breading people who only care about themselves. The think their life is the center of the universe, and that their feelings are the only ones that matter. They post every little detail about their lives on Facebook, as if they were on a reality TV program. They brush their teeth and we read about it on FB. (Or at least that is what they think we do!)

We all need to swallow the humble pill and learn to listen to others. We need advisors, people who will tell us the truth even if we don’t want to hear it. We need to be able to see beyond our own noses in order to make good decisions, ones that will stand the test of time.

There is wisdom in taking advice. It is foolish to think that we have to learn everything for ourselves. We don’t need to be hit by a car to know that streets can be dangerous places. We can listen to what our parents tell us. They have knowledge about cars and people: cars win! Their advice is worth heeding.

When we learn that others know things, then our knowledge can increase exponentially. We now don’t need to learn everything ourselves. We just need to know where to go to get the knowledge we need. We can just ask, or look it up. This is wisdom!

And when we gain wisdom, we don’t feel the need to be on top on every issue. And when that happens, the need to fight to save our image vanishes. Pride has taken a backseat where it belongs.